Back to Reality

As if Mondays weren’t already

It’s hard transitioning from fun filled holiday time and the weekend, full of rest and relaxation, to the mundane reality that is Monday…. ugh!

The holidays are officially over, well they’ve been over for me since New Years Day but for the kids, today was the first day back to reality. And Mark and I are just coming off our kid free time. We get one weekend per month to ourselves, and boy do we ever make the most of that time! If you’re following on Instagram, you’ll catch a glimpse of what I mean! Like everything though, all good things must come to an end. Mondays are our days every week with all the kids and up until this month it meant the older kids in music and Addison in dance all on, you guessed it, Monday nights!

Now thankfully Jayden has decided to take an interest in Dance as well and his hip hop dance classes are on Fridays and Alyssa doesn’t care for music anymore so as of now she’s not participating in anything. Addison has hip hop Monday nights still but it’s far more manageable just worrying about getting one kid to an activity as opposed to 4!

Still, we need to make sure that dinner is ready and finished in time to leave the house by 6:30. Addison and Mark don’t get home until after 6 so “rush” is the word of the day on Mondays! 6 mouths to feed all in a time crunch trying to cater to picky eaters to boot! Lately I’ve gone the easy way out and let the older ones eat Kraft dinner but as a Mom you feel terrible at the lack of nutrition in whatever that chemical-based sauce is, but they love it and on a day like this you take it! Addison has been in the habit of eating at my parent’s place before coming home to save time, she just needs to change into her dance costumes and we’re all set.

Mark and I worry about ourselves after all the running around takes place. That’s how it goes when you’re parents, you do whatever it takes to make sure everyone else is cared for and then you think about yourself.

I disliked Mondays before all of this. It would start Sunday night. Anxiety has a way of creeping in and even though Sundays are one of my favourite days (Football Baby!). I’d be plagued by that awful dread that fills your gut, that weight that falls heavy on your shoulders, that feeling like you hit a wall. The weekend was over and it’s back to work and the routine of the weekday madness.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m happy when the kids come back to us but the Monday after their extended stay at the other parent’s house is always a transition for them as well. Adjusting from life how it is there to life how it is here, takes some warming up again and time to settle back in before everyone feels at home.

As hard as it is to split on us adults, forced to be single parents, it’s another kind of nightmare for these poor kids. They didn’t ask for this, they didn’t want mom and dad living in separate houses and then introducing these new partners they now have to love and accept. All around splitting up impacts everyone involved. We were lucky to have a relatively seamless transition, you can read more about that here.

It’s easy to get consumed with your own grief and your own stress. Human nature is to think the world revolves around them. This makes it easy to lose sight of the fact that these people around you that you are trying to bond with and build a new family with, are struggling just as much.

We need to make a valiant effort to try our very best to practice mindfulness, to think of others before thinking of ourselves in these types of situations. This feels like mission impossible when you’re stressed out though, trust me, I get it. When I’m stressed out, all I want to do is curl up in bed, with a glass of wine and some good books and just shut myself out from the world. Maybe listen to one of my favourite playlists on Spotify with relaxing music and just chill. But us Mom’s know we don’t get that luxury, right!? We can’t just hide out. We have mouths to feed, a house to keep, errands to run and kids to take here and there. It just never stops, am I right!? And because it never stops, you can’t! The struggle is real.

I’m trying my best to see the silver lining even on the Mondays. Take a deep breath, let it go and be thankful for the chance to all be together again.

xx Jenn